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The Solution To Social Anxiety: Break Free From The Shyness That Holds You Back
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Discover How To Overcome Social Anxiety And ShynessAre you held back by shyness? Do many things seem out of reach due to social anxiety?Many people have settled into thinking this is just how life is... "This is just the way I am." However, nothing could be further from the truth.In this inspiring, breakthrough book, Dr. Aziz guides you along the path out of social anxiety and into greater confidence in yourself. You will discover what is keeping you stuck in shyness and learn exactly what to do in order to break free.After suffering from social anxiety himself for many years, Dr. Aziz became determined to find a way to social freedom. His deep understanding if what creates the social fears, shyness, and limitations, displays just how much he gets what it feels like to be shy.The first part of this book focuses on understanding the problem. You will discover exactly why you feel social anxiety in a variety of situations. This section teaches you about the deep underlying beliefs that lead to your fears, and you will learn the single belief that is beneath all shyness.In this section you will also understand why you have that continual fear of, "what will they think of me?" that can be so limiting in social anxiety. you will also learn about your inner critic, which is actually a much bigger drain on your confidence than any situation or person outside of yourself.The second portion of this book focuses entirely on the solution to social anxiety. Dr. Aziz starts by describing social confidence as the way out. Social confidence includes a feeling of relaxed freedom around others to be yourself without the self-criticism and judgment that are so common in shyness.You then go on to discover the 3 major steps of breaking free from shyness and social anxiety. These are:Know Who You AreAccept Yourself. All of YourselfTake Bold ActionStep 1 - Know Who You AreIn order to overcome social anxiety and feel confident and to relate to others with comfort and ease, you must know who you are. This includes owning your preferences, speaking your mind, and letting go of the need to please everyone else at the expense of yourself. Step 2 - Accept Yourself. All of Yourself.Most of the pain and suffering from shyness and social anxiety is not due to the rejection we receive from others. It's the rejection we receive from ourselves on a daily basis. You will discover how to turn your inner critic into an ally so you can feel more peace and joy in all of your interactions.Step 3 - Take Bold ActionNo matter how much we change our thinking and accept ourselves, nothing significant changes in our lives unless we take action. In order to truly liberate yourself and break free from shyness, social anxiety, and self-doubt, you must consistently move towards what scares you. In this section you will design your own customized action plan for creating social confidence and success.This book is by no means academic or aloof. It is full of practical tools and techniques that you can start using today to improve your confidence and free yourself of social anxiety and social discomfort. In addition, Dr. Aziz provides numerous engaging stories from the work he has done with clients, and from his own life, to illustrate how to use the techniques to forge a path to freedom. He is refreshingly authentic and honest about what it feels like to be shy, which can provide you with a great sense of relief in itself.Using the tools, insights, and clinically proven techniques in this book, you will learn how to:Stop worrying about what others will think of you.Free yourself from social anxiety, shyness, self-doubt and self-criticism.Identify your strengths and increase your self-esteem so you can feel proud of who you are.Overcome your fear of rejection so you can meet people, date, and excel in your career.Start conversations and meet new people without social anxiety or fear.Create fulfilling friendships and romantic relationships.
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Product details
Paperback: 230 pages
Publisher: The Center For Social Confidence; First edition (September 12, 2013)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0988979802
ISBN-13: 978-0988979802
Product Dimensions:
5.5 x 0.6 x 8.5 inches
Shipping Weight: 12.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.4 out of 5 stars
99 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#38,402 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
There are so many self-help books out there by well-known and famous authors, but I found this book by Dr. Aziz Gazipura, a much-lesser-known psychologist who practices in Oregon, to be so incredibly helpful and life changing. Even though people think I am extroverted because I have big social circles and appear to do well at public events, I have always had a low to moderate amount of social anxiety that has caused unnecessary stress, created many awkward social situations and conversations, and even caused crippling sharp stomach pain (such as after I leave an event or after performing music).The early part of the book (and the most helpful to me) is Dr. Aziz defining what social anxiety is, who has it (basically everyone at varying levels, but the ones who find it stifling their lives are the ones who will benefit the most from this book), and the roots. He breaks down the roots of social anxiety to a very basic concept, a lie that people with social anxiety tell themselves: "I am not good enough."He spends the rest of the book tackling other aspects of social anxiety and presenting scenarios and exercises for how to break free from these crippling thoughts. I love how practical the book is in this way. The only downside is that the online worksheet resource mentioned in the book is no longer active as when I read it the website didn't exist anymore.I listened to the audio version of this, read by the author, which was absolutely fantastic and had me in tears in the beginning as he fully addressed what I always thought was something imaginary in my head. By the end however, I felt very empowered -- understanding my (perfectly normal) condition better and how it is holding me back, and knowing how to move forward with the lessons of the book. Listening to the book was so useful that I bought the hard copy of the book so I can pick it up any time and flip through it. I was shocked to learn that it appears it is printed on demand on Amazon -- how can such a helpful book not have thousands of copies already sitting in a warehouse waiting to be purchased?After first listening to the audiobook, I instantly recommended this book to a few people I know who seized on it immediately and also found it helpful. It has been over a year since I read it, and I feel like this is the sort of book to pick up every few months or so to keep the ideas fresh in your head so you don't regress.In addition to the usefulness of this book, it is also a fun and easy read. If you do happen to listen to the audiobook, I swear that in the end Dr. Aziz is giggling a little bit, haha. You will appreciate this if you read the whole book because you will feel like you can laugh at and squash your inner voice that holds you back with the lies that socially anxious people have repeating in their heads.I totally would love to meet Dr. Aziz one day and thank him for taking the time to write this incredible book!
I finished reading the book just over a week ago, before attending a family get-together, and felt more comfortable conversing with people than I have for some time. I needed help to believe others are not judging everything I do and say and how I look. This book helped. I plan to re-read the book to reinforce the message. It takes time and practice to overcome social anxiety, and it's worth the effort.
I have read this book, and I have also been working directly with Aziz for several months. I recommend both experiences very strongly (although working with him directly is pretty expensive, so if you are tight on money, work with the book).I'm a middle-aged guy who has struggled with social anxiety my whole life. I sought out Aziz because I got a job offer that I knew was going to take me way outside my comfort zone, on a regular basis, and force me to take a lot of social initiative.I have tried talk therapy in the past, but found that I was just recounting and dwelling on my difficulties and failures. If anything, it made me feel worse.After several months of working with Aziz (personally and with the book), I am now making real progress, which I can see in successful efforts to connect with people.It's easy to explain where you need to go; getting there is of course the trick. Here's your problem, and mine: You think you are defective because you have a long history of bungled efforts to connect with people. Deep down, you think something is wrong with you. You go into your interactions with people with that mindset. And that's why you fail so often, which then reinforces your conclusions about yourself.You need to stop that. You have to understand that an ability to connect with people is just a skill, like any other. You weren't born with a natural gift for it, as some people are--otherwise you wouldn't be reading this. But that doesn't mean you can't develop the skill. You can. And once you come to feel that you just have an underdeveloped skill that you need to work on--rather than some deep personal flaw--you can start creating new patterns in your life.Aziz has devoted his professional career to finding practical ways to break down the self-destructive mindset holding you back, and to developing practical, specific exercises you can do to create a new pattern of success. He's done his homework, and he ties his advice to strategies that have been proven to work through psychological studies.But sometimes, he can get you just to laugh at yourself, at the sheer ridiculousness of the toxic way you judge yourself and hold yourself back. That can be the most helpful of all.Imagine a high school coach who stood on the sidelines during the big game screaming at his players: "You suck! You don't even belong on the field! You're going to lose, big time! Everyone is going to find out you're a complete fraud as a football team!"That's what you're doing to yourself. You need to cut it out. This book will help you create a self-reinforcing pattern of success, rather than a pattern of failure.
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